Two weeks to go in the regular season. A whopping SEVEN teams were officially eliminated from playoff contention this past week, and one of them was NOT the Browns (though they have ridiculously tiny odds and need at least one tie thanks to the Steelers).
Here’s what we’ve got in store for this week of football. No more Thursday Night Football, ya’ll!
GAME OF THE WEEK – SATURDAY NIGHT - Baltimore Ravens (8-6) at Los Angeles Chargers (11-3), LAC by 4.5 – Big game in the AFC. The Chargers can keep the pressure on the Chiefs in the AFC West with a big win here at home. The Ravens are in a logjam for a wild card spot right now, and are also right behind the Steelers for their division title. A win over a real contender like the Chargers could make a lot of people believers. Expect to see a real slobberknocker in this one, but ultimately the quarterback position is going to be what makes the difference. Looking forward to this game. Chargers 27, Ravens 20
SATURDAY AFTERNOON – Washington (7-7) at Tennessee Titans (8-6), TEN by 10 – The Titans are yet another team that’s in the thick of the wild card race in the AFC. They’re also on a winning streak and may be peaking at the right time. Washington got a much-needed win to stay alive last week but playing on the road against a hot Titans team they’re probably overmatched. Titans 23, Washington 13
Tampa Bay Buccaneers (5-9) at Dallas Cowboys (8-6), DAL by 7 – Woof. The Cowboys got shut out for the first time in something like 16 years this past week, and it did not do anything to make people think they are a legit contender in the NFC. They get to clean things up this week against a Bucs team that’s ready to roll over, but don’t let these Cowboys trick you into thinking they’re anything more than a one-and-done playoff team. Cowboys 20, Bucs 17
Buffalo Bills (5-9) at New England Patriots (9-5), NE by 12.5 – This will be the first time since 2009—the first time this DECADE—that the Patriots do not finish the regular season with at least 12 wins. Crazy. Patriots 27, Bills 17
Atlanta Falcons (5-9) at Carolina Panthers (6-8), CAR by 4 – The Panthers have the opportunity to become the first team in NFL history to go 6-10 after a 6-2 start. Teams that start 6-2 have made the playoffs more than two thirds of the time in the current 12-team format. UPSET! – Falcons 26, Panthers 20
Jacksonville Jaguars (4-10) at Miami Dolphins (7-7), MIA by 4.5 – Meanwhile, the Jaguars could become just the third team in NFL history to go 4-12 after going 12-4 the previous season. The last team to do it was the 2014 Falcons. The Dolphins are horrifyingly average, but the Jaguars have given up on the season. Dolphins 20, Jaguars 9
New York Giants (5-9) at Indianapolis Colts (8-6), IND By 1 – The Colts have sort of come out of nowhere after a rough start to the season. They’re getting hot at the right time (much like the Titans are in their own division) and could very well find themselves playing in January for the first time in several years. The Giants will give a fight, but it won’t be enough. Colts 27, Giants 23
Houston Texans (10-4) at Philadelphia Eagles (7-7), PHI by 1 – No team from Houston (Texans or Oilers) has ever beaten the Eagles, but if the Texans pull it off this week they are one step closer to sealing up an all-important first round bye. They’ll have to take down an Eagles team that looked much more the part of defending champs against the Rams in Week 15, and in Philadelphia no less. But If they’re going to be taken seriously in the playoffs, this is the kind of game they need to be able to win. UPSET! – Texans 27, Eagles 24
Minnnesota Vikings (7-6-1) at Detroit Lions (5-9), MIN by 5.5 – I can’t figure the Vikings out. Vikings 24, Lions 16
Green Bay Packers (5-8-1) at New York Jets (4-10), NYJ by 1 – The Packers suck so much that they’re underdogs to a 4-10 Jets team quarterbacked by a rookie. Jets 23, Packers 20
Cincinnati Bengals (6-8) at Cleveland Browns (6-7-1), CLE by 7 – Fuck it, even if the Browns aren’t going to make the playoffs I’d love to see them win out, get their first winning record in 11 years and give Cleveland something to be excited about heading into next season. Browns 30, Bengals 20
Los Angeles Rams (11-3) at Arizona Cardinals (3-11), LAR by 14 – This game is just what the doctor ordered for the suddenly struggling Rams. Rams 34, Cardinals 10
Chicago Bears (9-5) at San Francisco 49ers (4-10), CHI by 4 – A well-earned division championship for the Bears is in the books. They’re basically out of the running for a bye, but don’t expect them to let up for a second. Bears 26, 49ers 17
Pittsburgh Steelers (8-5-1) at New Orleans Saints (12-2), NO by 6 – The Saints haven’t looked great in recent weeks, but they just keep winning. The Steelers always play to the level of their opponents, but on the road in New Orleans inside a dome isn’t exactly their cup of tea. Saints 31, Steelers 27
Kansas City Chiefs (11-3) at Seattle Seahawks (8-6), KC by 2.5 – The Seahawks probably need one more victory to really feel comfortable about their playoff chances, but it’s going to be a hard one to get this weekend, as they take on a Chiefs team that is going to be looking to make a statement after collapsing at home against the Chargers. Chiefs 33, Seahawks 20
CHRISTMAS EVE - Denver Broncos (6-8) at Oakland Raiders (3-11), DEN by 2.5 – Bold prediction of the week: the Broncos lose to clinch their first back-to-back losing seasons in decades, prompting John Elway to fire Vance Joseph on Monday. UPSET! – Raiders 24, Broncos 20